That Time Again...

It's been so long since I last posted (not that anybody probably reads this anyway), it doesn't mean that I miss my Mom any less, of course. However there was a brief period of time where I could see that perhaps I am SLOWLY healing. While I don't think my Mom's death is something I will ever "get over" in the way people who aren't motherless daughters, who don't and can't understand would like me too; in my own way I am healing. It is a slow process, one that frustrates me, even more so when pushed by the one's who don't understand.

Once again the holiday's are upon us, once again they hold a horribly dark cloud over my head. Perhaps this year it is also because of other things going on in my life..I KNOW the holidays will never be the same without her but I wonder if they'll ever be easier, hold less of a black cloud of despair. Will I ever stop missing her, probably not, but I do wish that I could do more then fake the joy of the holiday season for my "niece and nephew."