Age is just a number BUT I'm having a hard time turning 30 today, without my Mom here to share it with and tease me about how her baby is getting old. Ever since my Mom died birthday's have seemed so pointless like why celebrate when the person who gave birth to you isn't here anymore?
Given my mother's untimely death, and the recent death of my aunt (her sister) only a year younger then my Mom when she died.... 48 and 47.... It's bringing back all those questionings of mortality. I know it's unrealistic but if I only have 17-18 years left I have to get a move on to have accomplished the things I wish had already been accomplished.
I have more to say on the subject but I'm eexhausted and my racing mind needs to quit so I can get some sleep. Where did the cursed insomnia monster rear it's ugly head from? Just another crappy day in the world of being a motherless daughter, even if it didn't all turn out bad.
Thursday, September 22, 2011
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